Peter’s Story: “Bladder cancer didn’t define me, but it did force me to reassess what really matters.”

Peter’s story

What started as a quiet day on the golf course quickly turned into a life-changing discovery. Peter Gelbwaks journey through a surprising diagnosis, years of treatment, and the power of family and early action offers a moving reminder of how quickly life can shift—and how resilience and support can carry us through. This is his story:

On April 10, 2022, I was headed out for a round of golf in the North Georgia mountains when I suddenly noticed blood in my urine. Alarmed, I went straight to the ER at Northside Hospital in Atlanta. After scans and evaluations, they discovered a kidney stone and referred me to a urologist for follow-up. That led me to Dr. Wesley Ludwig, who confirmed the stone, but during further testing, including a cystoscopy, he discovered I also had bladder cancer. That was a shock.

Thankfully, the cancer was caught early. I had surgery to remove the tumor and later got a second opinion from Dr. Mark Gonzalgo, who had helped my son-in-law years earlier when he was diagnosed with a much more advanced case of bladder cancer. My son-in-law had to undergo full bladder and prostate removal, which reminded me just how critical early detection is. Fortunately, I didn’t require major surgery, but I was put on a three-year BCG treatment plan.

The treatments have been physically and emotionally taxing, especially the BCG, which can bring flu-like symptoms and discomfort for days at a time. But I managed it by focusing on a simple mantra: “No cancer, no cancer, no cancer.” That helped me push through the hard days. Over these past three years, I’ve had about 35 to 40 procedures, including cystoscopies every few months, and even more work to remove and eventually treat the kidney stone. It hasn’t been easy, but I’ve stayed active. I’ve won four bocce championships, kept playing golf, and enjoyed time with family and friends.

What’s kept me going is my strong support system and the excellent care I received from my doctors and hospital staff. And while I’ve found comfort in reading stories and joining webinars through BCAN, I also had to find a balance, not letting cancer define every part of my day. Sometimes I needed to step back from it all just to live my life.

This experience taught me how important it is to listen to your body, act early, and educate yourself. I’m grateful for the life I’m still able to enjoy and hopeful that sharing my story encourages someone else to seek help early or feel less alone on their journey.

One of the most powerful things I’ve learned through all of this, my own bladder cancer diagnosis, and now supporting my wife through her breast cancer, is that it’s not just the disease that weighs on you. It’s the people around you who hold you up that make the biggest emotional impact. That’s when I get choked up, not when I talk about myself, but when I think about the family that stood beside me every step of the way.

My wife Sharon and I have been together for 58 years. We’re 78 and 75 now. We’ve built a beautiful, sprawling family over those decades. We have two daughters, one of whom we adopted at birth, and together they’ve given us six granddaughters. For a long time, it seemed like I was surrounded by girls, even the dog was female! I used to joke that there must’ve been something in the water. But when our daughter Julie remarried, she brought two stepsons into the family, and just this year, we became great-grandparents. A great-granddaughter arrived four months ago, and a great-grandson eight months before that. It’s been a wild and wonderful ride.

I’ve encountered more people dealing with prostate cancer than bladder cancer. My friends often bring it up in conversation, but not many have had bladder cancer, other than my son-in-law and a few older friends. That surprised me, because I never smoked, never worked with paint or asbestos or heavy metals. I was in the insurance industry for 55 years. My urologist even asked the same question: how did this happen?

One possible answer I landed on was an experience 15 years ago in Milwaukee. I got sick, really sick, from contaminated water. Turns out, over 400,000 people were exposed to a parasite called Cryptosporidium in what became a major outbreak. Some lawsuits have connected such contamination to various cancers, though not bladder cancer specifically, but it made me wonder. Maybe that was my trigger. There’s still so much we don’t know. I’d be interested to learn more about those of us who didn’t have the usual risk factors.

I found BCAN the way I find most things, through research. I’m a naturally curious guy, even though I spent most of my career in sales. I like to learn before making decisions, and after my diagnosis, I dove deep. I searched “bladder cancer” and started reading everything I could. I’d done something similar years before when dealing with recurring prostatitis. I like knowing what I’m up against.

If I could offer advice to someone newly diagnosed or just seeing blood in their urine for the first time, I’d say this: take action. Don’t wait around to see if it goes away. The moment I saw blood, I told my wife we were heading to the ER. No hesitation. Turns out I had a kidney stone too, but it was the cancer they discovered that day that changed everything. Even if it turns out to be something minor, it’s worth checking. A friend of mine had blood in his urine too—turned out it was just from overexertion. But better safe than sorry.

For those already in treatment: stay positive. It’s not easy. There will be bad days. But the process can work. My urologist said something early on that stuck with me: “You’re not going to die from this. You’re going to be treated, and you’re going to live a good life.” That helped me frame the whole experience.

I also made a choice to get healthier. I’ve lost 40 pounds the past year by changing my diet. I’ve stayed active, kept playing golf, spent time with family, and kept up with friends. I try to live as normally as possible. I think healing isn’t just medical, it’s emotional, physical, and social. All of it matters. Having a strong support system and a sense of purpose makes a real difference.

Bladder cancer didn’t define me, but it did force me to reassess what really matters. And now, as we shift to supporting Sharon in her journey, I feel even more grateful for the early detection, for the excellent care we’ve both received, and for every moment we still get to spend with the family we’ve built together.

20 Years of Impact: 20 Voices of BCAN

For two decades, the Bladder Cancer Advocacy Network (BCAN) has been a beacon of hope, support, and advocacy for patients and their loved ones. As we celebrate 20 years of collective progress, we honor the voices that have shaped this journey—those who have faced bladder cancer with resilience, and those who have provided unwavering support.

Through our 20 Voices initiative, we are sharing powerful personal stories that highlight the impact of bladder cancer and the strength of our community. These voices reflect the challenges, triumphs, and hope that define BCAN’s mission for better todays and more tomorrows for all those impacted by bladder cancer.